Lamenting

I cry out in pain

in confusion

in sadness

It’s all relentless

Every time I think I’m past it

it shows up again

I cry out to You, God

Are You there?

Are You real?

What am I supposed to believe?

What am I supposed to do?

This is what lamenting feels like

Breathing heavy and fast

Almost choking

Pounding my fists on the ground

I wait

And I hear nothing

Nothing but silence

I can almost feel You

Just almost

A tiny bit

But I can breathe

And I will carry on

And I will pray again

Tomorrow